Monday, April 19, 2010


I had another icky day yesterday. I had a bad pain episode that involved a lot of tears and yelling at my husband because he could not read my mind. Pain will do funny things to you...

I had a visit with my son, who brought me a card from his daughter, Annelise. As he was leaving, she asked for the card back and kissed it and hugged it so that I would get them when I got the card. Her idea. She is 3.

I have been feeling like I am in limbo here. The doctors do not understand my surgery, so they don't know whether what I am going through is normal or not.

I fell asleep early, but was awakened by my IV leaking. Around midnight, they had to remove it and put a new one in, this time on the back of my left hand. Ouchy ba ba ba.

When I did sleep, I kept having horrible nightmares of people trying to hurt me and kill me and wrecking my house. I woke up a few times yelling and terrified. It was too late to call anyone, and I felt very alone and uncertain of what's going to happen next. I finally feel to sleep for good around 4:30 am and was awakened by nurses getting blood, etc.
I had another bad pain event this morning. My Chicago doctor told me to request an MRI to see if the tumor is trying to escape.

I saw my Joliet doctor, and he has referred me to a gyno/surgeon who will see me today and order an MRI and then do surgery to remove the tumor, if that's what is needed. My Chicago doctor says that my pain should be getting better, not worse.

My pneumonia is getting better, although I still get very short of breath when I walk around. The Joliet doctor says if that was all that was wrong, he would release me today.

We will see what the new doctor says about the MRI and surgery today.

Yesterday, I was feeling like I might be getting clinically depressed. This is getting to me. But with the news of a possible surgery soon that will solve the problem, my spirits are up.
I just got my biopsy results. No cancer. I had almost forgotten about that little detail!

New plan: I am leaving this hospital tonight, after another IV pain treatment, going home and TAKING A SHOWER and going to the ER at the original hospital where I had the UFE. My surgeon will arrange to have me admitted, and they will do MRIs or whatever they need to do to find out what is wrong. This doctor also thinks that I do not have pneumonia, but something else.

But most importantly, and I cannot stress this enough, I will be TAKING A SHOWER!

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