Saturday, June 19, 2010


Okay, this is more of a general report than a daily report.  I have been so discouraged that I have not been posting what I have eaten and how much I weigh for the past few days.  These past three weeks have just been hell on tracking and staying on track.

On May 31st, about three weeks ago, I weighed my all time lowest weight since starting Atkins in March 2009 - 135.8.  I was so excited, and then everything fell apart, due to three weekends in a row of family functions.

The next morning, on June 1st, I had gained 0.8 pounds.  No big deal and I was not worried, and the next day it was the same.

On June 3rd, I gained another 0.8 pounds, and then I went out to lunch with my dad and forgot to tell the waitress that I needed my food unsalted.  By the next morning, I had gained another 2.4 pounds.  I was very careful with my food that day, and managed to get rid of one pound.

June 5th was my niece's wedding, and I added another 2.6 pounds to my frame.  Working hard the rest of that week, I managed to take off some weight, but the next weekend, I was at a family reunion for a couple of days and my weight soared again.

I did not have a chance to take it all off before this past weekend, which is still not over, and my weight is so high that I cannot believe it.  This morning, I weighed  146 pounds.  So that means that, in the last 19 days, I have gained 10.2 pounds.  That's over a half a pound per day.  Just from yesterday morning till this morning, I gained another 2.4 pounds.

Over this past three weeks, I have eaten high fat, moderate protein and very low carb during the week, and whatever the family is eating on the weekends.  This is not working.  Tonight, they all wanted pizza.  So they all ate pizza, and I ate three eggs fried in butter.  This is a miserable way to live. Then they sent out a family member to buy dessert - ice bream bars, mini candy bars, potato chips and Oreo cookies.  I had some of each.  I don't know why.

Tomorrow, I will be with the family all day, and will be being tempted to eat goodness-knows-what all day. 

If I weighed 146 this morning, what will I weigh when I get up tomorrow morning - 148?  150?  And, after another day of eating, what will I weigh on Monday morning?  155?

This is insane.  No one else in my family is gaining multiple pounds every day during these get-togethers.  Why am I?

And more importantly, why am I finding myself having absolutely NO CONTROL over what I am eating when I am with other people in party situations?  I've been eating right for over 15 months, and suddenly, I can't seem to stop myself, with any form of mental gymnastics, over eating what I know will cause me to be unhealthy and to gain weight.  Suddenly, after all these months, I am craving carbs to the point where I feel powerless against them.  Why is this happening?

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